.my mind said he wasgoing out to get somesanity, don't think he'scoming back becausehis things are goneand now i'm up to myneck in words that havesnapped cos i twistedthem all too far(it gets me down so much that it keeps me up at night)
here is my heart, and here is my home.i am done writing aboutblood. you can find mein the "new beginnings" isle, splashed with scar tissue and pale skin--i amwhole. dear child, open youreyes: there are stars, a galaxy, andthere is breath in your lungs. the past is neverforgotten, but you have lived through it,swam through it andmaybe died a little through it, but youcame out on top. when this winter ends, itwill end harshly;but spring comes every year,and i hope that youremember that;i hope you open your eyesto rain and i hopethat you fall in love with it, and i hopethat you let life movelike i had to.
What I Meant.*Accidentally bumps into you*-What I said-Oh, I’m so sorry..!-What I meant-I just wanted an excuse to hold your handCause even though I do the very best that I canI can’t face this world aloneThere’s too much I don’t understand*Accidentally holds your hand*-What I said-Is everything alright?-What I meant-What should I do if I can’t tell betweenThe reality of life or if it’s just a dream?I can tell the world is real enoughIt’s just not as pretty as it seems*Accidentally hugs you*-What I said-Are you okay?-What I meant-I guess I never wanted to believeThat something I helped createThat I thought was more than beautifulCould be so capable of hate*Accidentally kisses you*-What I meant to say instead-So prove me wrongAnd say it’s not too lateOr too bad, or no good and thatThere’s still room for one more clean slateBecause another se
If I Die Before I WakeIf I die before I wakePromise me that you wont breakTell me that you wont pick upAny whiskey in your cupPromise me you will be strongand remember the differenceBetween right and wrongLeave the blade in the drawerand dont use it anymoreLeave your tears in your eyesand save them for another timeIf I die before I wakePromise me that you wont break.
death is slimming.i.last yeara boy in my gradetook his own lifeand people said howsorry they werethat they all picked on himbecause he wasgay. they gave a shitfor about two weeks,but after that, itall came down.ii.they were backto calling each other faggots in the hallwaysand making gay jokes as if they don'thurt. as if theyhadn't ever hurt. iii.then this yeara seniorwas drinking and he got in a car to gohome. you can tellme what happened next,because we've all readthose stories. thosetragedies. and the day afterit happened, all the students were cryingbecause this was a boywas a great guy. hehad a girlfriend anda life ahead of him, and thiswas such a terrible accident.iiii.they said that thegood die young. butwhat is goodabout getting behind the wheelwhen you can't even see straight? iiiii.and when someonefinally got fed up with thelies and the idolizing,they called her the same thingsthat they called the boy last year
i keep my hair like i keep my blue jeans: shortthe beginningshe was all curls falling over shoulders and small hands and slender ankles, but she was also all crooked toes and cheek moles and half-baked smiles. she wore skinny jeans too long and too big on her and she always wore a jacket because she was always cold. and he thought that she was pretty beautiful the first time he saw her in a parade, sitting on top of a dodge truck and waving with both hands so that no one was left out. she was the kind of pretty beautiful that only came around when he said something stupid and she shook her head at him, trying to hide her teeth but failing miserably.she wore glasses but only when she was doing work or when she had a headache because she thought that her eyes looked too wide in them and all she ever wanted in life was to be people magazine's definition of pretty—which she wasn't (but don't tell her that.) she drank tea on sleepless nights, sitting on her porch and stargazing; she thought that ma
.at night, something madclimbs into bed with me andi go to war with myself -words i do not want sit on the tipof my tongue, so i bite the wholething off - crimson droplets fallfrom the sky, and i start bleedingrain - dead babies, their heartbeatsslipping through the cracks in myfloorboards - kettles abandoningpots and then finding that neithercan function properly - white sheets,pillowcases, walls and white faces -a rabid cat clawing at the inside ofmy temple, let me out - krill in thebellies of whales, their hearts likeempty lockets - suffocating in thesilver lining - secrets giggling likechildren in my mind, a game of hideand seek i don't think i want to win -a lamb frolicks around the body of alion and i reap something i nevereven sowed in the first place(you idiot, you idiot, what have you done)